Wednesday, June 25, 2008

A *Personal* Victory...

I debated blogging about this because I have serious issues with expectation and immediate gratification. When I want something, honestly, I want it now, and I expect it now .

I've been doing Weight Watchers with mixed success. I lost like a DEMON the first week. I was so proud of myself and slowly but surely, I toned down the hunger from oh my god i'm going to starve to a mere and manageable I wish I had more points today!

And then... I stopped losing despite POP'ing repeatedly. POP means Perfectly On Program, for you non weight watcher people out there. I wasn't working out but honestly, um... two kids is exercise enough!

Battling the hunger urges and NOT losing was dreadful. It got to the point where I said " Fuck it. I'll watch but I'm not going to kill myself ". And then I felt kinda guilty about quitting again, so I decided to do my usual kick your ass into gear. I went to try on pants that I loved but my ass had gotten too big to get into. There is nothing more humiliating than remembering how good you looked in a certain outfit and NOT BEING ABLE TO PULL THEM UP TO YOUR HIPS. Forget ZIPPING, I'd be happy with ON. Not being able to pull them up is a big giant FUCK YOU from your buttocks,
in case you haven't been through that particular emotion. Its my usual remedy for wanting to quit.

Oh my god. Not only did I get them ON, but DUDE they FIT. THEY FIT! THEY FIT THEY FIT THEY FIT!!!! And I very proudly wore them all day and resolved to keep at the Weight Watchers without killing myself, but with a good deal of effort.

NOTHING works better to get you back on program than FITTING INTO YOUR SKINNY CLOTHES!

Actually, just for the record... These pants are a size 12. I have both size 10's AND size 8's that I would like to get into, so I can continue to beat my self esteem into submission until I get there. But MAN, I look HOT in these jeans.


RissaRoo said...

Whooo Hoooo! You go, girl! That is so great. There's NOTHING like fitting into a pair of pants that you didn't used to fit! And, good for you for doing it the way you're doing it. I can attest to the fact that busting your a** and making yourself miserable might get some weight off quick, but it sure won't last...finding a balance that's possible to live with lets you keep it off for good!

Big Fishy said...

OMG All that use of the f*cking F word and all those F bombs.
Since I never use the word,I can't imagine where you learned it!!!!!!!

Mookie said...

What? No pictures?!? ;-)

GRANDPA said...

big fishy is now GRANDPA.He accepts your statements about your pleasure in going down a size.However, you always look slender to him.